Let’s be honest here. We’re not friends, are we? We don’t even really have a mutually beneficial relationship. You get me places…most often, I’ll give you that much. But in return, I give you gas, oil and other required body parts to keep you in shape. Then you get upset and sputter about a pothole that we may have run through.
I don’t like the complaining you do when I turn you off after returning home from work. I know it’s been a tough day of sitting around in the parking lot at work and all, but could you at least not groan so much once the key is out of your ignition? It sure would make me feel a lot better about the chances of you starting up the next morning. See…if I can’t get to work, then I can’t continue to give you things that you like and need to survive. So just remember that the next time you try teasing me about starting up.
I remember back when we first met. We were both a lot friendlier to each other. I guess maybe you were just trying to impress me back then. You can admit it. I won’t completely blame you. I realize that I probably don’t take care of you the way I should…but can you blame me? You treat me so poorly. Remember when we were driving home from work that one night, and you decided that while going uphill on a busy highway, you wanted to make your point by letting your engine cut out? I was still quite a way from home at that point. And it was cold. And dark. I guess we were both lucky that it was just a serpentine belt huh? Lest you might still be sitting on the side of the highway near the Grand River.
Oh, and you can stop glaring at me with that engine light. I know you’ve got a slow emissions leak somewhere in you. I’m just really pissed that the stupid people I got you from decided that they’d ignore my request to have that taken care of before my warranty ran out. Oh, and you…you played along with them and just hid the glare until after the warranty ran out.
While I’m being open about things…I might as well just say it. We’ll be better off without each other. You know it. I know it. But the thing is, we’re stuck with each other for a bit longer. I can’t just give you up. Unfortunately. So really…just stop being so mean to me. Just behave, and you and I can at least be civil to one another.